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| Name |
ihsan -
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| Profession |
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| Question |
Can you please define what you
mean by psychological benefits? And how does fasting
achieve these benefits?
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| Answer |
Everything we experience in life
has an effect on our thinking, emotions, and ultimately
our behaviour. Similarly, the act of fasting has
significant effects on our thinking, emotions, and
behaviour. This is what is meant by the psychological
effects of fasting.
Going hungry, thirsty, and indulging into other rituals
of fasting such as taraweeh, waking up for suhur,
and iftar (breaking the fast) – all these acts
affect how we think, behave, and feel. For example, just
the routine of it all brings a certain discipline in our
life that lots of us may not have had before.
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| Name |
farah -
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| Profession |
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| Question |
How can we solve family problems
around the table of iftar? |
| Answer |
Often unlike regular days families
try to break their fast and eat their meal together in
the holy month of Ramadan. This in itself provides an
opportunity for the family to be together at a happy
occasion of breaking their fast for a whole month.
Also, because everybody is hungry and thirsty there is
less preoccupations with other problems at that time,
and as well negative emotions such as anger, hurt, etc.
are under control. All of this provides an opportunity
for the family members to build and strengthen their
relationships.
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| Name |
shauqi -
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| Profession |
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| Question |
If you really believe fasting can
solve psychological problems, how can someone who feels
disappointed and has a lot of complications take fasting
as a solution? |
| Answer |
The holy month of Ramadan and
fasting in this month has a potential to be helpful in
resolving many psychological problems. But, if the
problems are long lasting and complicated, a person may
need additional help. Seeking such help in this holy
month often proves more beneficial than in other months,
that is, if the client and the therapist both practice
the adaab (ethics) of fasting.
If you had mentioned a specific problem, I may have
given specific way of dealing with that problem during
this month.
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| Name |
Aseel -
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| Profession |
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| Question |
Dr. Sadiq I am a very nervous
person with high blood pressure, and I can easily get
mad even when I am fasting. I sometimes find myself
fighting over little things and then regret after I
discover their being so trivial. What is your advice to
me in Ramadan?
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| Answer |
Dear sister,
If part of your anger problem emerges from high blood
pressure, then it should be treated medically so that at
least the high blood pressure is ruled out from the
picture.
Now then, you said that you get angry on trivial things
even in the month of Ramadan. Do you notice any decrease
in losing your temper while you're fasting? (I assume
you're fasting everyday.)
Generally, a person with a full stomach is more prone to
anger outbursts, so while one is fasting, there
generally isn't the same amount of physical energy to
get angry or to be angry with high intensity.
The purpose of fasting that Allah Almighty has mentioned
in the Holy Qur'an is "so that you would become
restrained." Other translations for the word
"restrained" are: god-fearing, mindful of your
deeds, recognizing your accountability before Allah
Almighty for all your deeds.
Keep the above in mind and often recite verse no. 183 in
Surat Al-Baqarah, pondering on its meaning; and
self-reflect while you're fasting if you're indeed
becoming self-restrained, god-fearing, and mindful of
your accountability before Allah the Almighty.
Close your eyes and imagine yourself standing in the
court of Allah the Exalted and think: are you ready to
account for your unjust anger at others?
Try this for the rest of the holy month, and insha'Allah
you will notice a difference.
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| Name |
sister in Islam -
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| Profession |
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| Question |
How can fasting and Ramadan
functions solve disputes between two couples who really
love each other but in so many times they fight and get
separated? |
| Answer |
First, please read the answer to
the question of sister Aseel.
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) teaches us
that the holy month of Ramadan is the month showing
kindness, being consolatory, and sharing the pains and
joys of others. Therefore, when one understands and
practices these teachings of the holy Prophet (peace and
blessings be upon him) in this holy month, it becomes
easy to resolve the differences in the relationships.
Secondly, due to the special blessings of this month,
our hearts are softened and generally people find it
difficult to be mean to others while fasting.
As I mentioned in the answer sent by brother Shauqi, if
the problems are long lasting and complex you may
require professional help to assist you resolve these
marital differences.
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| Name |
Mo'min -
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| Profession |
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| Question |
How can a Muslim enjoy the
happiness in Ramadan while the whole situation of
Muslims in the world is very bad and does not make one
feel happy. I can hardly have iftar when I watch the
news in Palestine and Chechnya. How can one strike a
balance between feeling sad and happy while fasting? |
| Answer |
Dear brother,
I can truly feel the sadness and hurt in your question
about the current situation of Muslim Ummah
around the world. The way we reconcile between feeling
sad about that and feeling happy for the blessings of
Allah in the holy month of fasting is by acknowledging
our individual weaknesses and the Might and Power of the
Almighty. It is true that you and I and others
individually cannot make a major difference on the
situation of Muslim Ummah, but Allah the Almighty
indeed has the power to change it in wink of an eye.
The holy month, and especially during the time of iftar
and suhur, promises us acceptance of our du`a's
(supplications). In one narration it is mentioned that
during the twenty four hours of each day, one du`a'
is accepted by Allah the Almighty from each of His
servants. Now, if we use our precious time during this
month in making du`a' for the Muslim Ummah,
at least we have in some way done our part in bringing a
change in the condition of the Ummah.
Secondly, understand that the Muslim Ummah is
made up of individual people. If individuals make up
their minds, especially in this holy month, to change
their own condition and become God-fearing and
accountable for their deeds and pray to Allah the
Almighty for help and guidance in changing them, the
whole Ummah and its conditions will change,
insha'Allah.
Remember what Allah the Almighty says in the Holy Book, "Allah
does not change the condition of a people until they
change their own lives." (Ar-Ra`d: 11)
This holy month provides an excellent opportunity for
all of us to begin this process of change. I pray to
Allah to help us do this.
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| Name |
please help -
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| Profession |
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| Question |
I am a teenager who is suffering
from sex pressure especially when I go to school.
Sometimes I feel my fasting does not count. What do you
advise me to do? |
| Answer |
As I have mentioned a number of
times already, fasting is prescribed so that we can
become restrained and God-fearing. Both these words
imply that we are going to try our best to live our
lives according to the commands of Allah the Almighty.
One of these commands is to keep your gaze down and not
look at strange women. The solution to your problem,
therefore, is to lower your gaze while you're at school
and at the same time keep reciting istighfar and
praying to Almighty Allah to help you and protect you
from the evils of the society.
We are taught by the Prophet (peace and blessings be
upon him) that if one fasts and at the same time lies to
people, Allah the Almighty does not require our hunger
and thirst to please Him. The same principle applies to
all transgressions.
Technically, according to my knowledge of the opinion of
fuqaha' (scholars), your fast is still valid when
you gaze at young girls and as a result suffer from
sexual thoughts. However, you do not get the benefits
and the spiritual rewards for your fasting.
Hope this helps!
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| Name |
Norwan -
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| Profession |
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| Question |
My kids don't like the masjid
and they love to go for other places. I find it very
difficult to take them to the masjid in Ramadan
to pray taraweeh and have iftar. I
sometimes prefer to stay home with them so that they
don't go to other places. Can you please suggest certain
steps I can use with them to make them feel excited to
going to the mosque. The age of my children are between
10 and 13. |
| Answer |
The problem you have mentioned is
unfortunately very common among Muslim families with
teenagers. Here is how you can attempt to handle it:
1. Insha'Allah, starting next year in the month of
Sha`baan, make it a ritual in your family to prepare for
the coming of the holy month of Ramadan. There are many
hadiths in which we find the Prophet (peace and
blessings be upon him) and the Companions (may Allah be
pleased with them all) taking special steps to prepare
for the holy month. Some ways you can do this is by
reading those hadiths in the family gatherings to
emphasize the importance of this month and the
prescribed and recommended things that one should do in
this holy month. Among them of course are: making
special efforts to pray five times and taraweeh
prayer in congregation.
2. Be an example, as parents, of these recommended deeds
for your children. If you as parents go to the masjid
only when convenient to you, then you teach your
children that going to the masjid for
congregational prayers is a secondary thing.
3. Given the age of your children, you are still in a
position to lay out some fundamental rules and
expectations in this regard. When children have clear
expectations from their parents, they are more willing
and try to abide by them. For example, if you said to
them, 'going anywhere else but to the masjid at
the time of prayers (at least some prayers) is not
accepted in this house.' And if both you and your wife
both follow through on it, you would notice a change in
their behaviour insha'Allah.
4. During all the important times of this month, pray to
Allah the Almighty to make your children steadfast in
prayers.
Hope this helps!
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